Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Quick Quiz - Are You Qualified To Be A Manager

The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "manager". The questions are not that difficult.

How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door.
This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Wrong Answer : Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator.
Correct Answer : Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.
This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.

The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The Elephant is in the refrigerator.
This tests your memory.

OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities.

There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting!
This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Andersen Consulting World wide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many pre-schoolers got several correct answers. Andersen Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most management consultants have the brains of a four year old.

Which Standard Are You In

A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.

The teacher asked, "Eddy what is your problem?" Eddy answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!"

The teacher had had enough.

She took Eddy to the principal's office.

While Eddy waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was.

The principal told the teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.

The teacher agreed.

Eddy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Eddy: "9".

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Eddy: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know.

The principal looks at the teacher and tells her, "I think Eddy can go to the third-grade."

The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"

The principal and Eddy both agree.

The teacher asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Eddy, after a moment, "Legs."

Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"

The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!

Eddy replied, "Pockets."

Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Eddy: "Pants"

Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?
Eddy: Coconut

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer,

Eddy was taking charge.

Teacher: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?
Eddy: Bubblegum

Teacher: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer.

Eddy: Shake hands

Teacher: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions, okay?
Eddy: Yep.

Teacher: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.
Eddy: Tent

Teacher: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

Principal was looking restless and bit tense.

Eddy: Wedding Ring

Teacher: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.
Eddy: Nose

Teacher: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Eddy: Arrow

Teacher: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of excitement?
Eddy: Firetruck

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Eddy in the fifth-grade, I missed the last ten questions myself."

In A Loo - Keep Your Mouth Shut

This Guy was traveling on a highway and took a stoppage to visit a restroom . Following is the true conversation that happened.

I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: "Hi, how are you?"

I'm not the type to start a conversation in the men's restroom but I don't know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed, "Doin' just fine!"

And the other guy says: "So what are you up to?"

What kind of question is that? At that point, I'm thinking this is too bizarre so I say: "Uhhh, I'm like you, just travelling!"

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question. "Can I come over?"

Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell him, "No........I'm a little busy right now!"

Then I hear the guy say nervously...
"Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!"

Friday, November 19, 2010

Is Computer Male Or Female ?

A college professor sets up two groups of computer experts.The first was composed of women, and the second of men. Each group was asked to recommend whether computers should be referred to in the feminine gender, or the masculine gender. They were asked to give reasons for their recommendation.

The group of women reported that the computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because:

1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.

2. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem.

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer you could have had a better model.

The men, on the other hand, concluded that Computers should be referred to in the feminine gender because:

1. No one but the Creator understands their internal logic.

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.

3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.

he he :P ... what do you think ??????

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

हिम्मत करने वालो की हार नहीं होती

नन्ही चींटी जब दाना लेकर चलती है
चढ़ती दीवारों पर, सौ बार फिसलती है
लहरों से डरकर नौका पार नहीं होती
हिम्मत करने वालो की हार नहीं होती |

नन्ही चींटी जब दाना लेकर चलती है
चढ़ती दीवारों पर, सौ बार फिसलती है
मन का विश्वास रगों में, साहस भरता है
चढ़ कर गिरना, गिर कर चढ़ना, नाहक जाता है
आखिर, उसकी मेहनत बेकार नही होती
कोशिश करने वालो की हार नही होती |

डुबकियाँ सिन्धु में गोताखोर लगाता है
जा-जाकर खाली हाथ लौट आता है
मिलते ना सहज-ही, मोती पानी में
बहता दूना उत्साह, इसी हैरानी में
मुट्ठी उसकी खाली, हर बार नही होती
हिम्मत करने वालो की हार नहीं होती |

असफलता एक चुनौती है, स्वीकार करो
क्या कमी रह गयी थी, देखो, और सुधार करो
जब तक ना सफल हो, नींद चैन की त्यागो तुम
संघर्षो का मैदान छोड़, मत भागो तुम
कुछ किये बिना ही जय-जयकार नही होती
हिम्मत करने वालो की हार नहीं होती |

courtesy - Maine gandhi ko nahi maara
This is another one of the famous poems by Harivansh Rai 'Bachhan' ji

Friday, November 12, 2010


Armaan, a hindi movie

Movie teaches a lot. Sometimes, sorry not sometimes but we cannot experience all the things in our lives ourselves, so better we can read or watch and get to know the situations and so can be prepared beforehand. The bollywood movie ARMAAN is one of the movies. It let us through a difficult situation of life and shows how to handle it well. Some of our decisions can go wrong but if we can correct them at the right possible time, there can be nothing better. Everything was superb. Right from story, script, dialogues (were good), actors, support-cast and everything. But I will like to add Anil was at his best again.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Light up my life ...

I saw young girls in the orchard playing hide-n-seek,
leaving one, rest ready to hide behind the creek.

over there was one little angel, making her place in hay,
covering the grass over herself, making a cautious sway.

As I get close to her un-aware of her play,
felt ecstatic just by a glance of her presence.

the woods bear the reputation of a beast in its deep,
the girls had that in mind, but forgot the creep.

I touched an angel while she was hiding,
I was in shadow she thought I am a beast.


It changed the way she looked at me …